Chapter 56: His Grave

Merrie could barely move. It had been days, if not weeks, since the battle. She had to turn off the time-keeping spell, not because she couldn't use it, but the depression grew when she could count the seconds of being trapped in a cage, left to slowly starve to death. She hadn't eaten since but the pain in her stomach had long since faded into a lethargy that weighted her down. She couldn't even twitch her ears or her tail. Everything was limp and she had no energy to move.

She stared out into the porch, seeing nothing and feeling even less. There was no hope left, no reason for living. Shadows danced in her vision, swirling around like mist in the morning. She couldn't focus on them, though, because it brought the painful memories of her master's death to her mind. She just let them swirl around her, tickling her skin with the lure of a world she used to love.

Her attempts to kill herself had failed. Merrie tried too many times and now she couldn't separate reality from fantasy. She knew that Bass had raped her repeatedly, tortured her, and broke her. But, she couldn't remember if she hated him or loved him. She was convinced that she hated him, but her body grew slick at the memory of being impaled. In the haze of starvation and despair, she struggled with a love that couldn't possibly be true.

A fly landed on her nose. She crossed her eyes to stare at it. It fluttered its wings. There were others hovering over the corpse of the paladin and the other attackers. She reached out with her mind to snuff it, just as she did a thousand times, but nothing happened.

She was dying.

Her breath came out in a long wheeze and she resumed staring at the wall, seeing nothing and waiting for the inevitable.

“I tell you, Gom, I haven't seen this place before.”

“It looks old, though. Been here for a few years at least.”

“Do you really think I missed something like this every day for the last ten years?”

Merrie frowned, trying to determine if she was hallucinating the male voices drifting in from outside. She had never heard either of the men before, but that didn't mean anything. She had been hallucinating for days.

“Well, want to go in?”

Shadows blotting out the sun coming through the cracked windows. Merrie shifted her eyes to watch the movement; she didn't have the strength to lift her head from the ground. But, as she watched the shadows, she realized that she wasn't hallucinating. Someone was coming for her.

Fear spiked inside her, quickening her sluggish heart. They were coming to finish the job.

She tried to whimper, but her parched throat wouldn't make any noise. She ran the repulsion runes across her mind, but they refused to focus and faded away. She was exhausted and there was nothing to pull, not even when she was about to be attacked.

Gom hissed sharply as they turned around. “Damn, it's the vigilant.”

Through the haze of her pain, she remembered that sergeants in the city guards were called vigilants. She held herself still, waiting to see if it was paladins or someone else about to invade her home.

A new person walked up. “Why aren't you patrolling?” It was a woman with a rough voice. Her silhouette was slightly overweight with small breasts and short hair. Her cloak fluttered in the breeze.

“Well, Vigilant Tai,” said Gom politely, “we didn't remember this place. So me and Fang decided to check it out.”

“What, you think this building just showed up? It has an overgrown garden and it's rotting. This must have been here for years! Now, stop screwing around and get back on patrol!”

“I swear,” said Fang, “I haven't seen this mansion before.”

The woman turned to look at the window and leaned into it.

Merrie forced herself to turn to look at her.

Tai had dark, reddish hair and a scar on her face. She rested her hand over her eyes as she peered inside. “Do you smell that?”

They sniffed. “No.”

“It's rotting meat or a corpse.” She stepped back and Merrie heard the rasp of a sword being drawn. “We're going inside.”

“Um, begging the vigilant's orders, but—”

Tai turned on Gom. “Shut up, draw your sword, and follow me.”

“Shouldn't we call it in?”

“No, we aren't,” snapped the vigilant. She stalked around the porch, her shadow sliding along the broken glass.

Gom looked at Fang. “Why isn't she calling it in? I thought she was fucking the dispatcher.”

“Gail? Snick said they broke up last weekend.”

“How can a chick as pretty as Gail ever sleep with—”

“Gom! Fang!” snapped Tai, her voice on the other side.

Merrie turned as the female guard stuck her head into the gaping hole in the side of the porch. The tip of her sword hovered in the sunlight before she stepped into the porch.

Tai was broad-shouldered and short. Her hair wasn't as short as Merrie first though, but it was close-cropped on the sides but longer on the top and back. It had been pulled back into a thick braid that hung over her shoulder and down to the compact breasts straining underneath her tight shirt. A few strands of gray hair ran along her red braid, but otherwise she looked in her mid-twenties.

She turned and looked around, her eyes sliding over Merrie without seeing her. She had a deep scar down her cheek and a matching one across her left eye. Both wounds were puckered and old, but it didn't look like a knife slash but something else.

“What do you see, vigilant?”

Tai's gaze stopped on the paladin's corpse. “Someone got themselves killed.” Her boot crunched on the shattered wood. “Damn, it was a battle. I see four… five bodies.”

Gom, a dour-looking man, peeked in side. He pointed to the paladin. “Hey, I've seen that symbol. That's the… the…” He turned away. “Fang, who was that church that's been pissing off the herald last week? The loud bitch in white that was holier-than-thou all up and down the quarters? Remember?”

“Lemetri?”

Merrie flinched at the name.

“Yeah, Lemetri!” Gom snapped his fingers, “That's the paladin they lost!”

“How did they lose a damned paladin?” muttered Fang. “And how did he end up killed?” He peered over at the paladin. “Fuck me, something ripped this guy's chest out. I don't see a heart.” He gulped. “I don't see lungs or any other organs either. He got torn up from the inside.”

Tai groaned and rested her face in her gloved hand. “Fuck me with a sword, this shouldn't happen in my territory. Fang, can you call it in?”

Fang stuck his head in. He was in his mid-thirties and balding. “Begging the vigilant's pardon, but we trusts can't talk to the dispatcher, only hear her.” He smirked. “So, unless you want me to go wandering back to the guard house, it would be—”

Tao groaned again. She sheathed her sword. “Fine, I'll talk to her… the dispatcher. You two… look around and see if there are any more bodies.”

Fang and Gom looked at each other. Gom cleared his throat.

Tai stopped at the edge of the porch. She glared at both of them. “Fine, you can loot while I wait for the others. But,” she waggled a finger, “you both owe me a quarter of anything you fence, do you hear?”

“Mind if we use Young Margret?”

Tai waved her hand. “Don't get caught. I'm going to call it in.” She jumped off the porch and headed outside. “Damn it, there's two more bodies in the bushes! Looks like some animal tore them apart though.”

Gom and Fang looked at each other. Gom said, “I'll take the second floor, you loot the first?”

Fang pulled out a bag and handed it over to Gom. “Good hunting.”

“It's time to get a bonus.”

They both stepped over the rotted corpses and headed further into the house.

Merrie sighed and closed her eyes. She was nobody, not even worthy of their attention. She wished they would go away and let her die in peace. She wished she could shade the cage, but there was nothing left to cast spells. She was exposed and vulnerable. Her only hope was to remain still until they left.

“Never fucking sleep with guards,” muttered Tai as she stormed back into the porch. Her boots crunched on the broken glass of the artifact lantern. “Yeah, right, she'll ‘report it as soon as a glorious comes in.’ She could be licking the glorious out and would say that around the damn woman's bush. Fucking telepaths.”

Merrie cracked open her eyes, remaining still but curious. She didn't have the energy to move, to do anything.

Tai kicked at a knife and it spun off, bouncing off the empty cage for the pack.

Merrie shifted her head slightly to watch the blade spinning on the ground outside of the cage. There was a stain below it from where Tamin and the other dog was killed by the paladin's spell. She fought back the sob, desperate not to make any noise.

Slowly, she closed her eyes. She tried to erase the memory but she felt their deaths in her heart. The pain was too much as she tensed up, fighting the urge to move while the guard was nearby.

Tai's boots scuffed the ground. Faint vibrations shook the floor.

Merrie felt her close. The hair on the back of Merrie's neck rose up with the feeling that she was being watched. She strained to keep herself still, running through a simple spell to freeze her body, but the spell faltered.

“What kind of fucker would do this to such a pretty girl?” Tai was close enough her breath washed over Merrie's skin.

Merrie forced herself to remain still, but her heart pounded loudly in her chest. She silently prayed that Tai would go away. Her mind ran through the shade spell again but the runes crumbled in her mind.

“Fuck,” whispered Tai dangerously close, “she was beautiful.”

Merrie tensed at the closeness and intimacy of Tai's voice. She could picture the woman crouching down in front of her, looking at her limp body. Merrie wished she could push her away so she could just die alone. But, any hint of movement would ruin that. She held her breath and waited.

“Fucking bastards. She is too young to die like that. Why would they put her in a cage?”

Merrie's heart stopped when she felt Tai's hand caress her cheek. The touch of the guard's rough hand felt like a brand against Merrie's skin. A tremor ran through her body as she fought the tears and to hold herself still.

“Fuck me with a sword,” Tai gasped, “you're alive!?”

Merrie froze, berating herself. She had given up. She didn't want to be found. She desperately tried to force a spell to push Tai's thoughts away, but she couldn't focus on the runes.

The hand cupped her cheek as Tai rattled the door to the cage. “Hold on, baby, I'll get you out.” The door shook harder and the cage shifted underneath Merrie.

Her ruse ruined, Merrie opened her eyes and watched as the guard tore through the porch, looking for something. She stopped at the gaping hole in the side and grabbed a pipe. Grunting, she tore it out of the wall with a crack of wood. Patting it in her palm, she returned to the cage.

Merrie lifted her head to watch as Tai forced the metal pipe into the padlock.

Tai looked down and smiled. “Just give me a few seconds.” She bore down on the padlock, the simple device that prevented Merrie from saving her master. The metal lever she was using bent, but she twisted and bore down even harder.

With a ping, the padlock hit the ground with a thud.

Merrie stared at it and then began to cry. If she could have done that, her master would have been alive. If someone had just broken the lock, she could have saved her pack.

Yanking the door open, Tai knelt down to reach in for Merrie. Her hands were rough and calloused. Scars ran along both sides of her palms and down her arm.

Merrie saw Tai reaching for her and something snapped. She didn't want to be pulled from the cage, she didn't want to be saved. She cried out and pulled back. Her limbs were weak as she flinched from Tai.

“No, no, cutie, I'm not going to hurt you.” Tai's voice was soothing, like talking to a beaten puppy.

Merrie flailed out, her severed arms thumping against Tai's outstretched hands.

“Come on, girl, it's okay. It's okay.”

Cowering in the back of the cage, Merrie tried to pull away. She didn't want to be pulled into the light. She wanted to be in the dark and to die. She didn't deserve to live, not after losing the pack and her master.

Tai whispering soothingly, then lurched forward. Merrie cried out, a whine, when she felt the powerful hand grab her hair. Without giving her a moment to respond, Tai hauled her out of the cage, kicking and screaming.

“No, no, it's okay. I'm not going to hurt you.”

Merrie's knee caught Tai in the face, but the guard just grunted and pulled her closer.

Tai wrapped her arms around Merrie and yanked her close, crushing the screaming bitch against her chest and holding her tight. “Come on, I won't hurt you. I would never hurt a pretty girl like you. Come on, relax.”

Merrie sobbed and shook her head. Her mouth worked to say words, but the only noises came out were whimpers and whines. She struggled to escape, but as she flailed around, she grew aware that she couldn't escape the muscular arms holding her. They weren't Bass's, they weren't her master's, but she couldn't escape.

Her body grew flush with sensation of being trapped. She raged against herself, trying not to let the heat of being dominated override her suicidal despair. She wanted to break free, she couldn't give in. She couldn't surrender to anyone but her master.

“Calm down, damn it!” Tai whispered loudly against her ear.

Merrie screamed as she felt the heat ran long her body, a ripple of an orgasm, weak but as sweet as the first sugar treat of summer. It was a command and she fought against it with all her might. But, she was weak. She had been starving for a week. And the rush of being ordered was too hard to resist.

“Calm down!”

Merrie's will cracked. With a sob, she melted into Tai's grip and slumped against the warm body of the guard. The tears wracked her body, pushing her further into a spiral of despair.

Tai held her tighter, whispering in her ear. “There we go, girl. There you go. Just calm down.”

Merrie opened her mouth to cry out again, but she couldn't. Sobbing, she rested her head on Tai's shoulder.

The guard stroked her hair, whispering wordlessly in a soothing rhythm. She rocked back and forth.

The pain was still there. Being wrapped in the arms of another just brought it back and she sobbed at the ache that burned inside her. She couldn't stay, not with Tai, not with anyone else.

But, for a few minutes, she could pretend.

The guard's heart was pounding hard and the warmth surrounded Merrie. It brought back the memories of Bass and how the thriban held her close. Merrie wanted to fight, but she couldn't. With another sob, she melted further into Tai's embrace, clutching to the guard as she shook violently.

“It's okay, it's okay. Old Tai is going to take care of you.”

Merrie sobbed and clutched tighter. She breathed in the smell of sword oil, musty clothes, and smoke. Through the padded shirt, she listened to Tai's heart, the steady thump of another being.

The gaping wound of her missing master flared into agony. It tore through her senses, not hurting her physically, but yanking her into an abyss of despair and pain. She wailed out in agony, clutching Tai, but that only made it worse. The very presence of the woman holding her was somehow tearing her apart.

Tai said something, but Merrie couldn't hear over a fresh wave of pain.

Merrie tried to push away, but Tai held her closer. Every passing second tore at Merrie's mind, threatening to rip it in half.

(What did those fuckers do to her?) It was Tai's thoughts inside her. And with the woman's mind bursting across Merrie's senses, the agony became a lightning-hot whip across her mind. Every thought and pulse of emotion was a whip against the hole in Merrie's soul.

She cried out even louder, flailing to escape the intimacy of Tai's thoughts.

(Another panic attack?) Tai clutched at Merrie, pulling her tight to her chest. “I won't hurt, I won't.”

But every thought in the guard's head was a slash of agony across Merrie's mind. The emotions pummeled her, bringing back to the fresh pain of losing her master again and again. She tried even harder to break free but the weak thumps of her arms again didn't even loosen the grip the woman had on Merrie.

“Come on, just calm down. No one will ever hurt you again. I promise, I'll take care of you.”

Tai tried to grab Merrie's arm, but then froze. In her mind, the shock rolled across Merrie's thoughts like thunder as the woman focused on the severed end of Merrie's wrist. “Fuck me with a sword, what did they do to you?”

With the onslaught of Tai's shock, Merrie tensed until her muscles screamed in agony. Her body shook violently as she felt the woman's pity slam into her. Shame and humiliation rose inside Merrie and she cringed away.

“No, no, it wasn't your fault.” Tai pulled Merrie close, her arms like steel around Merrie's weak body, but the disgust and pity was thick in her thoughts. She hated the men who had ruined Merrie.

Fresh tears ran down Merrie's face. She cried under the force of Tai's emotions, like someone grinding her into the ground. Merrie closed her eyes and tried to bring up her shields. She had forgotten the feeling of being wrapped in tight leather and bound into place, not with her master able to pierce it so easily, but as the dog outfit buckled into place, the agony lessened.

Gasping for breath, Merrie screwed her eyes even tighter and focused on the shields. Her pussy and ass clenched as she pictured dildos being shoved into it. Her mouth trembled as she remembered what it was like to have a cock inside her lips and strapped around her head. With every passing moment, Tai's thoughts grew easier to tolerate and soon they were nothing but nails against her skin, painful but not agonizing.

With a whimper, she opened her eyes. While she was replacing her shields, Tai had brought her to one of the bathrooms on the other side of the house and put her in the tub. Hot water lapped at her thighs as it poured past the heating rune and splashed on the bottom. The stopper wasn't in place and the blood-streaked water circled down the drain.

“There you go,” whispered Tai. She knelt on the side of the tub and was rinsing Merrie off with a washrag. “That isn't so bad, is it?”

Merrie sniffed and looked up at her. She felt broken but at least with her mental shields in place, it wasn't agony that tore that through her. Just a crippling despair and loss that would never be replaced.

Tai smiled and swirled the rag in the water before cupping Merrie's chin to wipe away the blood. “I was worried all that blood. I thought that they had stabbed you in that nasty old cage. But,” she brought her hand to Merrie's shoulder, soaping up the gore with the rag, “but I haven't seen any wounds.”

Even through the shields, Merrie could feel some of Tai's thoughts. They were hazy and drifting, but Merrie could feel not only the growing protective affection Tai felt for her, but also the first curls of lust.

Tai's eyes flickered down, watching the water as it dribble down Merrie's front and sluiced along her breasts. As the caked-on blood melted off her skin, the sight of Merrie's hardening nipple brought a fresh wave of guilty lust across the guard's thoughts.

Merrie felt a blush of her own, responding to Tai's even through the pain of her telepathy. She squirmed in place.

Tai looked up. Her lips were parted and a blush on her cheeks. She made a show of rinsing off the water before going back. Her hands were firm as she wiped away the vomit and blood, bringing Merrie's shivering, naked body back to the air. As she moved, Merrie could feel her pointedly not looking at Merrie's wrists and ankles.

Finally, Tai spoke, “Did any of Lemitri's men hurt you?”

For a sick moment, Merrie considered nodding. But, she shook her head.

“Did the guy who own this place do it? Did he hurt you?”

Merrie shook her head violently, sobbing at the same time.

Tai pulled back, frowning and not believing her. “He didn't? Are you sure?”

Merrie nodded hard. It brought up a wave of dizziness and she clutched to Tai for balance.

“Oh, I could have sworn with the cage and your…” Tai glance down at her arm. She gulped, “… were you born this way?”

Merrie shook her head.

Tai said nothing for a long time and focused on cleaning Merrie. The rag worked along Merrie's front, circling around her breasts, and down to her stomach. The hesitant lust was still growing inside her, filled with guilty and spiced with pity.

“You were a slave?”

Merrie didn't know how to answer. She gave a little shrug. She was a slave, but she couldn't imagine her life without her master. By the time she was sold, she wanted it as badly as anything else.

Tai's breath grew deeper as a storm of lust and hunger rose inside her. Tai wanted to comfort Merrie and pull her from perverted world she was imagining. It never occurred to her, would never occur to her, that Merrie was part of that world. “Don't worry, girl, Tai will take care of you. You won't ever have to do those things again. And I won't sell you.”

Merrie closed her eyes and let out a soft breath. Even though Tai's fantasies of saving Merrie from an imaginary hell, Merrie couldn't stay with the well-meaning guard. She didn't deserve to live, much less find comfort. Even if she did, it would be an empty lie. Merrie's needs had been awakened at the mill. She needed to be dominated and beaten, fucked and punished. She reached out with her mind looking for any of that in Tai, but she could only find compassion and a need for love.

“Turn over and let me get to the rest of you.”

A tiny order that left a little thrill coursing through Merrie's veins, but it was the most that Tai could give her. With a long sigh, Merrie rolled over, splashing in the tub, and braced herself.

“Fuck me with swords, they gave you a tail too?” Tai's disgust was a bitter glare in Merrie's thoughts.

Merrie's cheeks burned with humiliation. She was beautiful, her master said so, but she didn't feel it with Tai. She closed her eyes and stopped hoping. She had to escape the mansion, find some place, and end the pain.

The washcloth felt good against her skin, though, as Tai finished scrubbing the days of dried blood and vomit from her skin. Merrie spread her legs to give Tai access to her ass and pussy, where the geas had torn her open.

Guilty lust burned brightly as Tail scrubbed the washcloth between her legs, working the soaked, slick fabric along her ass and the length of her slit. She gulped as she scrubbed Merrie, the lust burning. She “accidentally” let one finger slip away from the cloth to test Merrie's reaction.

Merrie, reading her mind, couldn't help but let out a soft moan. The finger felt good against her clitoris. It was an empty pleasure and without love, but her body grew hotter with the sensations.

When Merrie didn't flinch, Tai stroked her finger back and forth. Guilt burned inside her as she did, but so did the lust. Her thoughts seeped through Merrie's shields, painful and raw. (Please, please, to the swords, let her be into girls. I would give anything. Please, please?)

Merrie left the hope and desire burning inside the guard. She wanted to fulfill it, to give her pleasure, even though she felt nothing for the woman. She rocked her hip forward to give more access to the fingers caressing her heated sex.

(Swords, she's letting me. I'm fingering her. Oh, please—)

A high-pitched bell ran out. Both Tai and Merrie jerked from the suddenness.

Merrie frowned, she didn't remember a bell like that in the house. It ran out again and she realized it wasn't from the mansion. It came from inside Tai's head as a telepathic connection was forged with her.

(Attention, Vigilant Guard Tai,) it was a woman's voice, filled with stern hardness, barely hidden jealousy, and disapproval. The thoughts were strong and powerful. It came with a name and an image of a slender blonde sitting at a table. Gail.

Tai's emotions turned to frustration and guilt. She yanked her fingers from Merrie's pussy as she sat up.

(The Church of Lemetri are sending a contingent of church soldiers to take custody of the domicile. They are led by Paladin Golid. Your group has three tasking orders. Order one: Pull back no less than one hundred meters and protect the house from all intruders. Order two: detain any persons of interest within the premise or surrounding and deliver into the paladin's custody. Order three: ensure the contents of the domicile are assigned to the paladin's custody, effective immediately. Any deviance will be punished. That is all.)

Merrie tensed as she heard the orders sinking in.

The guard tensed and gave Merrie a guilty look. “Hold on, I-I need to talk to the guys really quick. Can you,” she looked around at the bathroom, “stay here?”

Merrie nodded, looking innocent as possible and pretending she didn't hear the order. There was no question that Tai knew that Merrie would be a “person of interest” but already there was a storm as Tai wondered if she could hide Merrie before the paladin got there.

As she watched the guard rushing out of the room, Merrie considered her options. She could let Tai sneak her away and hide her, protect her from the paladin, and then care for Merrie maybe for the rest of her life. But, it would be unrequited love. Tai could never be a master for Merrie and Merrie didn't deserve to live without her true master.

There was only one way to stop the pain, to end the agony. She had to kill herself. She stared at the edge of the tub as she rolled the idea through her mind. It would end the pain that gnawed at her insides, slashing every time she experienced an emotion or a thought. She missed her master so much that she couldn't wait to be with him, even in spirit.

She smiled through the tears. She could finally do it. She didn't have to use the geas, just find some way of ending her life. There was an entire city out there: she could jump off a bridge, crawl in front of a wagon, or even throw herself into the river.

A decision made, she crawled out of the tub. Water sluiced off her body as she landed on the rug. She caught sight of herself in the mirror. She looked like hell. Her breasts had shrunk with starvation and they hung limply from her chest. Fading bruises covered her body and she shook without realizing it. Her right ear was broken and hung limply against the side of her head. It ached, but so did the rest of her.

Merrie could see why Tai wanted to protect her. She sighed and crawled to the door, cocking her one good ear to listen. Tai's voice was at the stairways, talking sharply to Gom and Fang.

In the opposite direction was her master's room. Merrie bit back a sob at the realization. It tore at her heart as she was reminded of what she had lost. She couldn't live without him. There was no way she could survive with so much pain tearing her heart. She had made a good choice.

With morbid dread, she crawled out of the bathroom and down the hall. She had to see his room one last time, to take one last look. She hoped to find something of his, something she could take with her when she ended her life.

The room was empty and peaceful, but the memories were ripping at her very being. She sobbed to herself, her body shaking and the tears rolling down her face. Crawling in, she took in the mussed up bed and the smell of her master and Rimmy that still clung to the air.

Barely able to breathe, she circled the bed, unsure of what she wanted. She found an open wardrobe and peered inside, the memories crushing her more than the still air. Through the tears, she caught sight of the dark cloak her master wore during his jobs, the cloak of shadows. With a gasp, she grabbed it with her mouth and tugged it down. It flopped down over her head, surrounding her in his scent.

Memories crashed into her, tearing into her soul. Her entire life had been centered around him. The pleasure that he gave her, the little commands he insisted she obey, and the punishments when she deliberately got in trouble. She buried her face in the cloak, choking on the cries that ripped out her ruined throat.

“Baby?” Tai's voice drifted down the hall.

Merrie gasped and shoved the cloak into her mouth, to gag her. She curled up on the floor of the wardrobe and shook, wishing it was a cage like before and she could never escape.

The bathroom door creaked open. “Damn,” Tai said and the disappointment radiated from the guard. “Come on, girl, I won't hurt you, I promise.”

Merrie forced herself to stop crying, using a spell to clamp down on her emotions. The little pleasure she got from Tai's fingering was enough to power the energies. It activated with a popping sensation and the tears stopped instantly.

She could feel her pain eroding at the spell and the despair leaking through the cracks. Merrie only had a few moments before she was sobbing again. Feeling the tears cooling on her cheeks, she pulled the cloak to her chest. When she realized she couldn't carry it, she slipped it around her neck and pulled the clasp tight with her teeth. It would look foolish while she was crawling, but she couldn't leave without something of her master.

As she moved, she planned out her next move. Getting out of the mansion would be hard, but she had just enough energy that she could afford a few seconds of repulsion. Her destination was a bridge about a kilometer away. Her master had once paraded her outside in the sun one day and it was a fitting place for her end.

The spell sealing her emotions cracked with her reminiscing.

Pushing out of the wardrobe, she crawled along the floor. The cloak slid off her side and hung heavily on her side, the collar tugging on her throat. She didn't need it for long and she just suffered with pulling it along.

As she was coming around the bed, something caught her attention. It was a glint of something dark underneath the bed. It drew her attention and she crouched down to peer at it.

When she recognized the shadow-stone engagement ring, her spell crumbled. Despair ripped at her through and the tears began to flow again. She continued to plummet into despair, further than she had ever gone before. The suicidal thoughts rose up but they were crushed by the darkness that consumed her entire world. There was nothing left. If she could have stopped her heart, she would have.

The door to the room flung open. “Baby!” Tai rushed inside, filled with concern and compassion.

Merrie snapped her head up. From somewhere deep inside her, below the despair and devastation, energy boiled up and calligraphic runes slammed across her mind. She barely recognized the domination spell as it exploded from the cloud of darkness in her mind.

Tai froze in mid-spell, her eyes glazed over and her muscles locked into place. Her shields were stripped away in an instant and every moment of Tai's life was laid bare to Merrie's mind. She could rewrite it or destroy it. She could make Tai her slave just as she was the slave. She could make her pack again, using the broken minds of Tai and the other guards. It would just take a little of the power now rising up inside her.

Panting, Merrie reeled back. She shook her head as the darkness invaded her thoughts, snuffing out all the hope and joy. There was nothing left for her, not unless she took it. She wanted to kill herself, to kill everyone, to lash out and take the world with her into choking darkness.

She shook her head, trying to force the thoughts out. She couldn't destroy. It was wrong but she was a bitch, not a harbinger of destruction. She had the power and the ability to kill any one being in her life, but she was powerful enough to include the entire city with it. It was a spell her master used when he was dying and it hovered in her thoughts.

Fresh tears on her face, Merrie crawled around the frozen Tai. She reached out and held Gom and Fang, both of which were trying to sneak out the back door before the paladin came. They were already planning their share of the loot, but she crushed that with a thought. She forced them to drop the bags on the ground.

Anger boiled inside her. She struggled with herself as she crawled down the hallway. Her limbs made whispers of noise. She wanted to tear everything down, to send the mansion and her master's grave to where the Lord of Shadow was waiting. She would die with the rest of the city, but it would be a small price to pay for sweet oblivion.

She stopped at the front door. She could feel the Lord's presence in the Shadows, beckoning to her. It was a shadow in a shadow, a curl of darkness formed of alien thoughts. It was watching her, waiting.

Merrie shook her head. (I,) it was agony to project to the alien intelligence on the other side, (I can't do that.)

It didn't response, but she could feel it paying attention to her.

Sobbing from the agony, she tried to clear her thoughts. The despair was everywhere, yanking her into a darkness she couldn't escape. It wasn't a matter of killing herself, she was going to do that, but simply how many people she would take with her. Shuddering with the effort, she pushed open the door and crawled to the porch.

The air was warm and moist. At the gate of the mansion, people were staring curiously inside. The shade that protected the place had been stripped away and there was nothing to prevent looters from stealing her master's life and paladins from destroying it.

She couldn't lose her master. Even with her suicide on her mind, she couldn't bring herself to destroy the mansion. It was their home for years. It was his for many years. It was where he cried, he lived, and loved. If she killed everyone, then his grave would be destroyed in the results.

Closing her eyes, she brought up the shade spell. It was a calligraphic mix of runes and poetry, a combination of her own magic and the spells passed down by her master's master. Fixing the runes inside her mind, she channeled her despair through it. The spell began to darken inside her, turning pitch black as it grew ready to release. When Rimmy taught Merrie the spell, it was just a little spell designed to be layered on top of itself, thousands of days made a spell a thousand layers thick. But, it wasn't enough. She needed to protect her master's grave from ever being found again.

Merrie opened her mind and let new runes inscribe themselves into her thoughts. She added more spells into it, crafting a brutally elegant spell that would prevent anyone from every seeing the mansion again. It would not only repulse people coming close, but it would burn the very memory of the place from the minds. No one would ever remember it, no one will every destroy his grave.

It was hard to keep in her mind, but she didn't care. She forced herself to power the spell, forcing more power until it was a shadow burning itself in her mind. Ice-cold power filled her, sinking into her bones until they ached.

The spell released with a rush. The sun above her turned into a black orb as shadows burst out of the gardens and the house. It rose up and swallowed the mansion, sucking it from the sight and memory of the city.

Blood dripped from her nose as she anchored the spell deep into the ground. The air was icy and choking. The shadows of the World Tree turned into pitch-black streaks across the yard, places were the veil between worlds was thin and delicate.

The repulsion was too much for a single house. It burst out from the mansion grounds and rushed out into the rest of the district. She could feel lives trapped in the darkness, like a fly in amber, caught and choking. They would never escape, they would never see the sun again.

A flare of energy shone brightly in the darkness. It was a telepath looking for her lover even as the district was swallowed in shadows. Merrie watched as Gail tried to find Tai, dread and concern resonating from the questing tendril. There was love in Gail's thoughts, love and passion and regret. It was a mere shadow of what Merrie felt for her master, but it was as bright as a firefly in a thunderstorm.

It broke Merrie's despair. She watched as the telepath searching for her lover even as she was frantically ordering guards to the district. Images flashed across Merrie's thoughts, of the dispatcher center in chaos as the blot of darkness was visible even across the city and from the royal palace.

Merrie closed her eyes and pulled back, letting the spell sink down into the bones of the city. She needed to hide the house, not making it visible. Through the connection, the blot faded and everyone's eyes slid away from the home. The district became somewhere else, a place the world had forgotten.

Merrie caught Gail's probe.

The woman froze, both in mind and body. Merrie saw her own reflection in Gail's thoughts, the darkness in the shape of some terrible hound holding Gail by her throat. It was death and it was Merrie, some horrible force that Gail couldn't comprehend. The differences between them was more than Merrie could imagine. Merrie's thoughts were alien to the telepath's, just as the Lord of Shadows was to her.

Guilt slammed into her, despair that she was killing the woman who had saved her from the cage, and then killing her lover. It redoubled as she realized how easily she was going to sacrifice the district inhabitants for her own sorrow.

Merrie reached out and connected herself to every living being in the district. They were blind, frightened, and dying. The Shadows were sucking the life out of them and it would be moments before their souls would burn away like her master and Rimmy.

She ran through a portion of the uplift spell—careful to avoid any bonding aspect—and slammed it through the telepath's probe. In the dispatcher center, Gail suddenly screamed as her body glowed with power. Her mind unfolded and crystallized as Merrie gave her the spells needed to save her lover and everyone else.

Bringing everything together, Merrie connected every living being in the district to Gail. At the same time, she gave a single command, inescapable and overpowering. (Save them and forget.)

Power flowed through Gail as she slumped back. A moment later, a mental bell rang out across the city, followed by a command to every guard in the city's employ. It was Gail's voice that cut through her mind. (Attention all city guards! Attention all city guards! City-wide emergency has been declared for the ...,) the thought faltered as Gail tried to remember the district's name, (… fuck this, obey the following tasking orders.) Gail's mind split as she began to give out simultaneous orders to every guard, her mental voice overlapping as she guided the guards to save the survivors of the district.

Merrie stopped paying attention. She slumped forward on the porch and crawled down. She was dead inside, a despair to great there was no more hope, no more love. She crawled down empty streets of the district as she planned out her death.

There was a bridge at the border between the district and the next one. Her master had taken her there once, on the few trips out of the mansion. He had pulled back the shade and everyone saw her as herself, a naked woman on her knees. It was exhilarating as they fucked under the bridge next to the rapidly flowing river.

It was an appropriate place to die. Setting her jaw tightly, she crawled down the tiles. Around her, the shadows whipped around as they swallowed the district. It was a place of darkness in Franome City, a place that time would forget. Her master's grave would stand forever, a reminder that she had lost so much in a single night.

Rain splattered down, icy and cold. It iced over underneath her knees and clung to her hair. She felt the sting along her skin, as if her body had been rubbed raw. It barely registered and she continued to crawl down the middle of the cobblestone road as she was pounded by the rain.

A few streets over, she saw a group of guards braving the darkness. They were rescuing a young girl and her puppy trapped in her house. One of them was holding a golden flame to push back the darkness. The others were fighting to keep up as the shadows reached for them.

Merrie looked away. Not all of them would make it. She could feel something rising out of the Shadows, a deadly intelligence taking advantage of the thin barriers between the worlds. It wouldn't be able to escape the district, but it would protect her master.

When she came out of the darkness, the sunlight hurt. It was raining outside, but the water was warm and sluiced down her body. At the far end of the bridge, crowds were milling around as the guards gathered. None of them were looking at her or the district; their eyes refuse to acknowledge the world in front of them. They just knew they had to be there, because of the orders that Gail sent to each one.

A guard pulled a sobbing man from the district. There was blood pouring off both of them and the guard was missing his arm. Something had torn it off and the man's agony was raw against Merrie's senses.

They both stumbled past her. She didn't exist in their world anymore, she was nothing.

Merrie watched them for a moment, then crawled to side of the bridge. Below, the river was bisected by light and dark. On the shadow side, the waters had become a raging river of black foam. In the light, it boiled and shifted. She knew it was deep enough to kill her.

Merrie crawled to the edge. She closed her eyes and—

A hand grabbed her by the hair and pulled her back. Old fingers grabbed her around the waist and hauled her off the side.

Merrie opened her eyes. She was no longer at the bridge, but in her grandfather's porch, standing at the black void where the farms used to be. There was nothing in front of her, no sparks of light, no fields, no grass. Just oblivion in all directions.

Devastated, she struggled to escape and leap into the darkness. She had to go, she couldn't live without her master.

Her grandfather pulled her back, dragging her to the safety of the kitchen.

“No!” she cried out, thrashing harder. She reached out for oblivion, desperate to feel its embrace.

"I will not let you, my love."

Tears ran down Merrie's cheek. "Let me go!"

“No,” came the whisper, "I can't."

“Let me!” She tried to lash out with a spell or fist, but nothing came. She clawed at the ground, the ends of her wrists dragging uselessly over the bricks. The sharp edges cut her arms and bright blood stained the bricks, but he kept pulling her away.

The kitchen door slammed shut, blocking her from oblivion. Merrie broke free and flung herself to the door, but she couldn't grip the handle. Her useless hands slipped off the handle. Sobbing, she pounded on the door, hoping she could somehow break it down.

“Why, why!?” she screamed.

“I can't let you kill yourself,” said her grandfather.

“There is nothing! He's gone. I lost him!” Her voice was shrill against the walls.

"I can't, little one."

"Why?"

"Because I was programmed not to. Haviston cast it to make sure you could survive long enough to bond."

Merrie turned on her grandfather. “I bonded! I was happy! You know that! And I lost him to… I couldn't do enough.” She slumped to the ground. "I wasn't good enough to protect him. It was my fault."

Oblivion howled silently right outside of the door.

Her grandfather knelt down next to her. He set down a bowl of tea and rested his warm hand on her back. "I know, but not this way."

"I don't deserve to live."

“Yes, you do,” he said sadly.

"Let me die!"

Her grandfather shook his head. "You must survive."

Merrie's tears splashed on the floor. "I already bonded, there isn't a reason to protect me anymore."

"If you are here, then I need to protect you."

She looked up helplessly. "I don't have anyone. I'm alone."

"You have me."

Shaking her head, she pushed at him. "You are my memories and Haviston's spells, nothing else."

“You have me,” he leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead. "But, no matter how bad your life becomes, I can't let you do this."

"I-I could destroy you."

He smiled. "But, you won't."

"W-What do I do?"

"Live."

“How? There is nothing left.” She clutched at his leg, trying to find some comfort in the grandfather who only lived in her mind. He was warm and comforting, like a blanket that she curled underneath as a child. In a flash, the blanket was there, draped over her body. It was the same texture and scent, the same feeling when she was a little girl, curled underneath it as a storm raged outside.

Her grandfather swept her up as a little girl and held her to his chest. "Stay as long as you want. Come back when you need. But, I will not let you go to your death. I cannot, I will not. Even if I wasn't a spell, I love you too much to let you leave."

Tears burning her eyes, Merrie looked up at her grandfather. "Will the pain ever go away?"

"No. No, it won't."