I had these terrible nightmares, of being torn apart or having my body rot from the inside. I don't know if was the pain of being taken by him, or just because my body is responding, but something doesn't seem right. I'm not sure what do so, so I thought I would write it out (not in too much detail) and see if getting it out in words is enough to help.
I know its only been a day, but I can't help thinking that he left something in me. In that aspect, I think I really should explain what happened, I'm just not sure how to do it in a way that won't point out exactly how much he hurt me.
Screw it, I don't need to bring it up. But, there was one point when I was slammed up against the wall. He had cracked my head against the wall and I was too stunned to respond. That was when he entered me. His cock was strange, it was long and narrow, but it was in this soulsteel “cage” that was basically bands around its entire length. The tip was smoothed over, that was the only mostly painless part of it. Once the bands started tearing into me, it hurt. You know, like bleeding screaming type of hurting.
Well, he drives up into me, nothing nice or even pleasant, just this horrible, horrible sensation of being violated. The strange part is when he got inside me, there was this… cracking noise. Not bone, but like when I got accidentally electrocuted. My entire body spasmed and I could hear my bones creaking.
He pressed up against me, all those devices digging into my back. He yanked it out, the pain only increased and rammed it back into me. When he bottomed out, I felt that electrical popping sensation and I was threw into spasms once again.
Rusted Jade did that for at least twenty minutes, that popping sensation every single time he drove into me. Then, he leaned forward to whisper in that slow, evil voice of his.
“You have… a weakness… Gears. Your friends. As long… as you have them… you'll always fall into these traps.”
I didn't say anything. He yanked himself out and I fell to the floor. Water poured over me and I started to cry. I didn't want to, I wanted to be strong but… I just couldn't.
sigh
That was two days ago. Yesterday, I was back on my feet. Gearshift was in the hospital bed next to mine. He survived, but he won't be walking on his own for at least a couple of weeks. Rusted broke both of his arms and legs, but it was a trap for me. When Rusted threatened to kill Gearshift if I just left, that is what set off my charge… which ends worse than I was hoping.
Well, yesterday night, something strange happened. It was right before lights out. We were all in the main room of our wing, people not talking about what happening but everyone trying make sure I was okay. Kind of nice that these prisoners actually cared for me.
Then, everything went silent. Rusted Jade Saw came out of his cell and stood at the entrance. Everyone disappeared into their cells as the Autocthon strode toward me. I wanted to kill him, but everything still burned, so standing up was about the limit of what I could do.
That dank smell of soulsteel, I could easily hate it. The whimpering sounds that seem to follow him just grate on his nerves. But, this man, this attacker and violator, the person who hurt my Gearshift walked right up to me with a confident smirk on his face. I was trying to figure how to rip him apart when he spoke.
“Gears…”
The burning sensation inside me flared up and I started to shake. I knew I was glaring at him, I wanted to rip him apart, but he was healthy (not even a scar!) and I was still weak from what happened.
“… you are mine.”
“Like hell I am!” I wasn't going to be some bitch for an Autocthon and sure as hell not for one like Rusty. The Exalted just smiled, saying nothing. I balled up my fists, ready to attack him at the first sign. Around me, people were peering out from the cells, watching with fear. I didn't see Piper though, I think he couldn't watch.
Rusted shook his head, “No… no fighting. I have… plans for you. Gears. Very… good… plans.”
I snapped back, “Then plan without me, I won't ever help?”
He raised an eyebrow, I could see the soulsteel tracery along it pulsating softly.
“Oh?”
“Yeah!”
Rusted Jade Saw did a terrible thing. He leaned forward, smiling and said a single word.
“Kneel.”
I started to refuse, then I felt that electric pop inside me. It shot through my arms and legs, electrocuting me. To my horror, I dropped to my knees. I tried to stand up, roll away, do something, but my body refused to obey. I was trapped. Trapped! Inside my own body!
Rusted grinned, “You'll do whatever I want, Gears.”
He held out his hand. There was this jagged piece of broken glass. I looked at it in horror, trying to yank myself away.
“Take this.”
I wanted to refuse, but that popping sensation burned through my gut, coursing through my veins and I felt tears forming in my eyes as I reached up with a shaking hand. I felt the sharp edges in my hand as I held it front of my.
It was terrible, not being in control of my own body. Everything refused to move as I held up the plate glass shard in my hand, letting it catch the light. Rusted Jade watched me for a moment, that cruel smile on his face.
“Ever heard of the Ultimate Conditioning Methodology?”
I didn't and shook my head. He continued.
“Its a device that some of us Autocthons have.”
I thought back to his cock and that strange soulsteel cage that wrapped around it. He saw the fear in my eyes, and it was fear, and nodded.
“Yes, that was it. It bends the will of weaker minds, such as yourself. Even cocky little men like yourself are nothing but toys.” He repeated himself, “Nothing but toys.”
Clearing his throat, he slowly turned around and walked back to his cell. No one else moved. I tried to force myself up, or to throw away that glass held out in front of me. My hand was squeezing around it, blood seeping along the sharp edge.
Rusted Jade Saw stopped at his cell door and turned around.
“Do you want proof, Gears?”
I couldn't answer.
“Cut out your eye, Gears.”
And that terrible electrical popping sensation from deep inside my body. I screamed out as my hand turned the sharp point of the glass toward my right eye. I couldn't move, I couldn't do anything! I just saw the point growing larger, the anticipation of pain almost too much to bear.
Then, something flashed across my vision just as I jammed the point of the glass toward my eye socket. It impacted soft flesh but someone yanked the glass out of my hand, then slapped me hard across the face. It broke Rusted's compulsion on me and I was able to crawl to my knees, sobbing with the utter helplessness of everything.
It was Piper. My friend from the prison had a plate glass shard in his hand, where I stabbed him. I was almost in shock, but Rusted Jade's laughter drifted down the wing.
“Next time… Gears… you won't… have friends.”
He returned to his cell, closing the door behind him. I scrambled to my feet.
“Oh, Piper, I'm so sorry!”
Piper grunted, looking a little pale. He pulled the glass out and threw it to the ground. When he looked at me, he has this angry expression across his face.
“He did this to you, Gears. That bastard doesn't deserve to live.”
I sighed, grabbing one of the towels nearby and tearing it into bandage. I helped Piper wrapped it around his arm.
“What do we do?”
Piper whispered angrily, “We kill him. We kill the Exalted.”
I can live with that.