Merrie was still alive but she didn't know how or why. She had been torn in two and there was an emptiness that would never be filled again. Her master was gone, ripped from her and lost forever in the Shadows. She hungered for his thoughts, the song of his heart against her own, and the dark lust that had burned in his mind.

She wanted to reach out, but she knew she wouldn't find him. There was no other reason to use her power. She couldn't suffer seeing the painfully familiar porch or the cage that had prevented her from saving him. She would have given her life to save him, done it without even a second thought. But, a padlock and a cage had ruined everything.

Her lips cracked as she opened her mouth. The air was foul with the corpses rotting in the porch with her. She could still taste the blood in the air and the fading alcoholic scent in the air. Her home was exposed to the sun but no one came back.

She didn't want to be saved. Merrie prayed that she would die herself, even if it meant starving in the cage she couldn't escape. There was no reason to live, no hope left in her. She had lost everything in a single night.

Time passed painfully slow, moving with the sluggishness only marked by the sun that peeked through the cracked windows of the porch or rain that buffeted the roof. She was sure it had been days, but she had no way of telling anymore.

She kept her mind wrapped inside itself. There was no magic left inside her, no joy in reaching out. No voices called out to her and she missed the intimacy that her master gave her. She wanted to feel his pulse inside her body as his cock filled her.

Tears ran down Merrie's face, mixing in with the blood that coated her skin. She wished he would come through the back door and it would all be a bad dream. He would stand there with mock rage before yanking her out and throwing her to the ground. She remembered when he yelled at her until she peed, then made her lick it up. He fucked her as she was licking, pounding her into the tiles as his cock slammed deep into her pussy.

Her body warmed slightly but she tore her thoughts away. He was gone. There was no pleasure left and she didn't want to cum ever again. It would be the only penance she could give his memory.

Her body ached. The geas had torn her insides and she could still taste the magic on her lips. When she shifted, the dried blood cracked and peeled off her naked thighs. Her ass and pussy burned from the effects and she kept tasting shit-stained magic on the tip of her tongue.

She inhaled and tried to say something, to force the spell to kill her, but she couldn't. The words refused to come out. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get her throat to work. She gulped to ease the dryness and tried again, but her mouth just opened and a long wail ripped out.

Merrie slumped back to the blanket and let out a sob. She kept playing the battle in her head. If she had just refused to get in the cage, if she could control the pack better, if she could have just enhanced him a bit more. A million what-if scenarios burned through her mind and she felt the guilt tearing down at her.

She was told that she wouldn't survive the death of her master. She felt it when they bonded. There was no way that she could have survived, not with the gaping hole left in her soul. It was a ragged wound that hurt every time she thought of him.

More tears ran down. Merrie missed her master so much. She wished with every fiber of her being that she could somehow end her life and join him. She knew the spells he used to slaughter the paladin, but she couldn't find the energy to cast them. Even if she could, she wasn't sure she could control the twisting shadows enough to plunged them into her own body. Casting shadow magic would turn her into the shadows and defend herself against her own power.

She let her mind turn back to the geas. If she could get a word out, maybe she could end the howling pain inside her. She opened her mouth and tried to force the word out, but it wouldn't come. No noise, nothing. Her subconscious refused to let her free.

Merrie slumped down and stared across the shadowed porch. She could get the word out. She let her mind drift back, but her life had been cut off by the bonding. She couldn't remember anything before the Puppy Mill and her rapist, Bass.

Her ears perked up.

Somewhere at the beginning of her memory, she was in his bedroom. Bass was raping her and she was trying to fight him off. She had spoke at the wrong moment and his cock tore into her ass, ripping her open. She would have bled to death if it wasn't for Borias.

Her tail twitched. Bass almost killed her with his hatred. If she could duplicate it, maybe she could break through the geas. She frowned as she tried to bring back the memory.

It came easily. She was on her hands and knees, bent over the pillow. Closing her eyes, she pulled the blanket out from underneath her and made a makeshift pillow. It pressed against her chest. Her knees ground on the steel floor of the cage.

She tried to remember the exact position. She spread her legs far apart, exposing herself to the cool air. She had one arm braced against the headboard; she pressed her forearm to the bar of the cage and balanced herself.

Her pussy grew hot and she squirmed uncomfortably. She didn't know why she got excited whenever she thought about Bass. It felt like she was preparing to be mounted by her master, but it was Bass in her thoughts, not the dark lover that she lost.

She sobbed and slumped against the cage door. She couldn't do it. She couldn't get to him.

Merrie dredged up the determination, trying to use the hatred for her rapist to remember everything he did to tear her open. She would kill herself, one way or the other.

She spread her legs, remembering how the blankets felt on her knees.

Bass tightened his grip on her breasts, crushing them against her chest and driving her tighter against his. He lifted his head and dropped it down so he could whisper in her ear. "Horny, Cunt?"

She took a deep breath and nodded as she barked out a whisper.

"You want my cock?"

Another stifled bark.

"In your pussy?"

She didn't have a response for no. After a moment, he asked the question she wanted all day.

"In your ass?"

Merrie moaned as she barked. She thrust back on his cock and ground his balls between their thighs. She felt his cock surging between her legs, growing hot and hard. The desire for his shaft pried her legs apart as the swollen length stretched out further in front of her. She knew the cock intimately now, but looking down at the half-shadowed shaft, she ached to have it tearing her open.

Merrie's eyes snapped open and confusion burned inside her. She never wanted Bass. He ruined her. She closed her eyes tightly and let out a sob, she was losing her mind. She never wanted that huge cock or the knot swelling inside her.

But, the memories were clear as day. She remembered when he was behind her, grinding the thick swollen member against her asshole. It was huge, too big for her.

Her breath quickening, Merrie pressed her arms against the cage and pushed back, mimicking the false memories in her head. She rocked her hips back and forth, swaying as she imagined the thick cock against her tiny asshole.

It was slick, she remembered that. It was huge and he had to push just to force the thick head into the tight hole. It hurt, it was too big. Fresh tears ran down her cheeks as she rocked harder, thumping her head against the door of the cage.

Her body was growing hot. She could feel it coursing through her veins, just like her master did when he came inside her. She opened her mouth as soft cries fell out of her mouth. She would be with her master soon, she just had to pretend that she wanted Bass' cock.

Merrie slumped forward and despair filled her. She knew what he was doing, he was easing her open like he did to Licker's pussy the night before. Merrie whimpered and pushed back, trying to keep the cock against her anal opening.

He returned to her, but it was another frustrating grind against her body before pulling away. The thick rivulets of precum added to her juices, but Merrie couldn't think past the frustration that burned in her gut.

She needed to make him understand that she wanted him to fuck her as hard as he could. She ached to make it hurt. The heat boiled in her pussy and she dug her fingers into her palms with frustration. In her mind, she screamed at him to drive into her, to bury his entire length. She could feel his hard length poised to fill her, but he continued to ease her open.

Her mind spun furiously. She knew Bass wanted to bury himself in her. She could feel his desire mixing with her own, but something held him back. It was fear and she could feel it as a dark cloud over them. Bass struggled with more than just fucking the bitch in front of him.

A fierce joy filed her. She would scream out, not to have her rapist impale her but to join her master. She only had to find the words that pushed her over the edge. She delved back into the memories, letting herself be consumed by the false images of something that would never happen.

Her body was hot and slick. She was dripping wet but she didn't know why. It wasn't pleasurable. He was going to tear into her but her body was craving it. She felt her sphincter tighten along with the inner walls of her pussy. The smell of her excitement rose up around her, mixing in with the blood and rot.

She sobbed to herself, struggling to keep the lust bright in her mind. She could feel the thick hands against her shoulders, rocking her back and forth. She leaned into the memories, rapping her head against the cage as she imagined his cock poised at her asshole, ready to tear into her.

Merrie panted as she screwed up the courage. Her head hurt as she smacked it against the cage, rattling the accursed padlock that had kept her from her master. Her body was burning hot and she felt juices dribbling down her thighs. It was a clean smell, a happy smell, a scent she didn't deserve.

She wanted to roll over and stroke herself, to bring herself to an orgasm. She needed Bass' cock. She needed to feel the knot tear into her.

Still sobbing, she rocked hard against the cage with the memories. she remembered being desperate, the struggle to cry out but her throat refusing her. She opened her mouth to force the word out, but it wouldn't come.

Merrie trembled at the touch. He was holding her shoulders and pulling her back. His cock, the huge length poised to tear into her rectum was a straight line. It would only take a single word and she would impaled. She hyperventilated as she screwed up the courage.

Merrie panted as she rattled the cage. The flames of pleasure were burning her from the inside. She could feel her pussy clenching with the imagined thriban behind her. She ached to feel herself being torn open.

She felt the pressure peaking. She knew it was only a second before he would start to relax and ease out of her. She closed her eyes tightly, ground her palms against the headboard, and then screamed out.

“Harder!”

The world exploded into agony as her insides tore. The memories of Bass slamming home crashed into her and she screamed out as an orgasm tore through. Blood bubbled from her mouth and down her legs, but it was torturous pleasure that ripped her open. She could feel Bass' cock buried inside her, the intense heat and pressure filling her to the core. She remembered the blood pouring of her ass and the wet sounds of it splattering to the blankets.

But, she wasn't dying. She could feel the geas ripping at her insides, adding agony to the pleasure that coursed through her veins. She slammed her face against the cage and sobbed as the memory dominated her. Her body shook from the despair that raged through her.

“I-I have to pull this out.” He sounded scared, not the commanding master she expected. "Just one little yank and you'll be free. Just hold your breath and… get ready…"

Merrie smiled through the tears that ran down her cheeks. She didn't want him to leave, she wanted him back inside her. She wanted to feel the pain of being impaled. Another orgasm rushed up inside her, searing at her pussy, as she pressed her hands against the headboard once again. She knew how to bring him back.

Even as Bass' cock surged with heat and hardness, he held her hips to push out. She wanted until she felt the knot bulging out of her asshole.

Merrie screamed out, saying the same words as her memory. “Again!”

The geas ripped into her, but so did the pleasure. She remembered how he slammed into her, tearing her open and filling her. Her pussy clamped down on the agony and she came again. She didn't know if it was pain or the ecstasy, but her insides rippled from the sensation and she cried out.

She wallowed in the pleasure, fighting against the memories she knew were false, but it felt real. Her body responded as if she had loved Bass, wanted him. Her mind craved the intense feeling of being stuffed to her limits.

Her orgasmic strength fled her.

Blood dripping from her ears, nose, and mouth, she slid down the cage and landed on the bottom. She felt her inside burning, just like the false memories.

Merrie wasn't dead.

She didn't know how.

She didn't know why.

She didn't want to live.

If the fake memory of loving Bass was the only way to end her life, the only way to get out a word, then she would keep reliving it until she was finally with her true love, her master, once again.